Autism, Aspergers, Rob Gorski,Special Needs Parenting, Reactive Attachment Disorder, Fibromyalgia,

Tag Archive: slate

Jul 20 2012

The clean slate

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It’s no secret that we struggle with Gavin’s behaviors. One of the things  that we do as often as safety allows,  is wipe the slate clean at the beginning of each new day.

This basically means that what happened yesterday is in the past.  This allows us the possibility of moving forward.

While this is not always possible or easy,  we do make a concerted effort towards providing him a fresh start every day.  Sometimes we can’t because of the severity of the previous days events.

Safety must always come first.

By doing this,  I feel that we are teaching that mistakes happen and everyday is a learning experience. 

The frustrating part of this,  at least for me is that,  Gavin never learns from his mistakes. Despite that,  we try anyways to provide him with the tools he needs to move forward. 

By ensuring that each day is a fresh start,  we are attempting to elevate the burden of yesterday‘s mistakes. 

**Thanks for reading**

       -Lost and Tired

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This was posted via WordPress for Android, courtesy of Samsung’s Galaxy S III. Please forgive any typos. I do know how to spell but auto-correct is working against me.

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May 21 2012

The clean slate

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Today begins a new week for the Lost and Tired family.  Something that I don’t know that I have ever mentioned before is my approach to each day. 

Basically,  we start every day with a clean slate. This was started mostly for Gavin but has since been adopted by all of us.

When Gavin would have a really bad day,  I would reminder him at bedtime,“tomorrow is a clean slate.  All the mistakes and less than good decisions of today,  will be washed away while you sleep.” 

It seems to help and I think it sends a relatively positive message to our kids,  at least for now. :-)   I have adopted this attitude myself or rather I try to adopt this attitude.  It allows me to forgive myself for not being able to do better for my family.

< em>**Thanks for reading**

       -Lost and Tired

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Permanent link to this article: http://lostandtired.com/2012/05/21/the-clean-slate/

Dec 24 2011

Guilted and Manipulated

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After Gavin had regained his composure from his first meltdown of the day,  I wiped the slate clean and  started the day over.

We had decided that we would try to split up this afternoon and one of us stay behind with Gavin.

However, things have since changed.

Gavin took it upon himself to guilt Elliott into not wanting to go visit his grandparents.

Elliott came downstairs and said the he no longer wanted to go because Gavin couldn’t go.  If Gavin was allowed to go then he would change his mind. As he is saying this, Gavin is peaking his head around the corner sporting a huge grin. 

I hadn’t said anything Elliott about Gavin not going today and Lizze has been in bed with a migraine for hours so it wasn’t her.

Gavin appeared quite proud of himself as I called him to come downstairs and explain how Elliott found out that he wasn’t going today.  Gavin knew he was busted and so entered the second meltdown of the day.

Now we aren’t going anywhere.  It was stupid to even try to pull this off. 

I’m at the end of my rope with Gavin right now.  Whether it’s his fault or not,  he’s driving me absolutely crazy.  Lizze’s migraine is back with a vengeance,  so she has been sleeping all day and I have been left to try and cope with this on my own. 

I need someone to figure out what the freaking hell is going on with Gavin.  In a perfect world,  I would know exactly what was within his control and what isn’t. That would make dealing with all of this much easier. 

Of course,  in a perfect world Gavin wouldn’t have any of these problems and I would be venting on the blog right now.

I’m beginning to turn into a grinch at this point.

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Permanent link to this article: http://lostandtired.com/2011/12/24/guilted-and-manipulated/

Oct 01 2011

Nightmares

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I think in pretty darn frustrated with Gavin.  Gavin decided that it would be a good idea to tell Elliott some horror stories before they went to bed tonight. 

These stories involved zombies,  decapitated people,  and a few other grossly inappropriate things.

Elliott comes downstairs to let me know why Gavin was telling him.  I call for Gavin very calmly,  even though I’m actually pretty ticked off at this point. 

The moment he hits the stairs it’s an instant meltdown and drama ensues.

I wanted to know why he would say these things to his little brother again.  I say again,  because this has been an issue before and it had to be dealt with then and clearly we’re gonna have to do this again.

Gavin goes to bed and I’m left with a really nervous/anxious 5 year old who is afraid to sleep alone now.

Guess Who’s in the couch tonight.  ;-(

Gavin is driving me absolutely crazy today.  I don’t know what’s going on with him but to say he is struggling would be an understatement,  as would saying that I was merely frustrated.

Tomorrow is a new day and brings along with it a clean slate.  I just need to locate my reserve of patience and I’ll be ok….I think.

image
image

– Lost and Tired

Posted by WordPress for Android via Samsungs Epic Touch 4G (provided to me at no charge by Sprint) without the use of proper editing tools and disadvantages of a bastardized version of auto-correct. So please forgive the spelling ;-)

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Permanent link to this article: http://lostandtired.com/2011/10/01/nightmares-4/

Oct 01 2011

Nightmares

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I think in pretty darn frustrated with Gavin.  Gavin decided that it would be a good idea to tell Elliott some horror stories before they went to bed tonight. 

These stories involved zombies,  decapitated people,  and a few other grossly inappropriate things.

Elliott comes downstairs to let me know why Gavin was telling him.  I call for Gavin very calmly,  even though I’m actually pretty ticked off at this point. 

The moment he hits the stairs it’s an instant meltdown and drama ensues.

I wanted to know why he would say these things to his little brother again.  I say again,  because this has been an issue before and it had to be dealt with then and clearly we’re gonna have to do this again.

Gavin goes to bed and I’m left with a really nervous/anxious 5 year old who is afraid to sleep alone now.

Guess Who’s in the couch tonight.  ;-(

Gavin is driving me absolutely crazy today.  I don’t know what’s going on with him but to say he is struggling would be an understatement,  as would saying that I was merely frustrated.

Tomorrow is a new day and brings along with it a clean slate.  I just need to locate my reserve of patience and I’ll be ok….I think.

image
image

– Lost and Tired

Posted by WordPress for Android via Samsungs Epic Touch 4G (provided to me at no charge by Sprint) without the use of proper editing tools and disadvantages of a bastardized version of auto-correct. So please forgive the spelling ;-)

Please Vote for Lost and Tired (just click the link) and help me spread Autism Awareness. Everyone can Vote once a day :)

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Permanent link to this article: http://lostandtired.com/2011/10/01/nightmares-3/

Sep 10 2011

Oh…no he didn’t

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Oh yes he did.  Who did what,  you may ask?  Well,  Gavin spit on Elliott.  I don’t know what brought that on and frankly,  I don’t care.  We do not spit on people. That is completely unacceptable in the Lost and Tired house. 

Before you ask,  no,  it wasn’t like he was talking and accidentally spit a little bit.  This was actually spitting on his little brother.

I’m not saying Elliott was innocent in all of this but he was the spittee and Gavin was the spitter

Oatmeal was brought back out of retirement because I don’t know what else to do in this case.  We don’t hit our kids and very little works on Gavin outside of oatmeal.  For those of you wondering what the oatmeal thing is all about,  here’s the dime store version.  Basically,  with Gavin we have exhausted every other option we could think of and nothing works.  So,  when Gavin needs to be disciplined,  we will replace his next meal with oatmeal. 

Gavin likes oatmeal but in cases like this the oatmeal is made with water and no sugar is added.  He dislikes this greatly but is more upset about being held accountable for his actions then he is about having to eat the oatmeal.  It’s outside the box but sometimes desperate times call for desperate measures.

So tonight Gavin will have oatmeal for dinner and then the slate is wiped clean.  I’m at a loss as to what should be done but nothing was not an option. I also don’t want to make to big of a deal out of this either and this seemed to strike a nice balance.

Have any of you fine folks had to deal with spitting like this before?  What have to done to address it and has it worked?

– Lost and Tired

Posted by WordPress for Android via Tegra 2 powered Motorola Photon 4G (provided to me at no charge by Sprint) without the use of proper editing tools and disadvantages of a bastardized version of auto-correct.

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