Autism, Aspergers, Rob Gorski,Special Needs Parenting, Reactive Attachment Disorder, Fibromyalgia,

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Dec 14 2012

Another successful meeting


We got our 2nd team wraparound meeting underway a bit late today. However, despite the delayed start, the meeting went really well.  As far as I’m concerned, this meeting was very productive and we had some great ideas brought to the table. 

Our initial goal is to reduce the overall stress in the family.


The reality is that Gavin will likely be home for 2 weeks over Christmas break. There really isn’t anything we can do about this.

As you already know, I prefer to deal with reality and so we are putting together a plan to make this as liveable for everyone as possible. 

The boys principal had a great idea about setting a really ridged schedule/routine that is as close to what occurs at school as possible. She is going to meet with us next week to set this schedule up.  She is such a big help. 

We also located an indoor playground that we can take the boys to in order to get them some more exercise. That will help as we.

We see going to also work on setting up what needs to be done in order to get our case manager. This case manager will likely be our wraparound coordinator and that will work out well. 

We brought Gavin into the meeting to share with him all of the positive things everyone had to say about him.

He’s doing really well at school and that’s awesome. 

Like I said, the meeting was very successful and we have some things to get done before our next meeting, right after the New Year. 

Thank you to everyone for attending and sharing some really good ideas.  We appreciate your time and thank you for your help.  :-)

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Dec 13 2012

What have you resorted to in order to get your child with #Autism to eat?


Dietary issues are pretty common when dealing with kids on the #autism spectrum. Factor in things like food allergies and sensory issues and it really can get complicated. I can’t stress this enough. I wish people would throw away the old saying that if their hungry they’ll eat. I don‘t think that it applies here.


We aren’t talking about just picky eaters. These kids have a physical aversion to certain colors, smells, tastes and textures. They’re not being difficult. In many cases the child will go hungry rather than eat something that will upset them. When you add in food allergies or special diets, you’re essentially removing options that can make getting them to actually eat, extremely difficult. My Elliott’s the same way. We met with a dietitian yesterday to seek advice. Elliott is losing weight and hasn’t grown in the last year or so. One of the things we are focusing on, aside from avoid tree nuts, is increasing his caloric intake. I’ll be honest, I’ve basically violated many of the rules in parenting 101. At times, I have resorted to bribery, in order to get him to eat. Tonight, for example, I ordered pizza because I knew he would eat it. I’ve been trying to get him to eat all day and at most he would nibble and that’s it. I don‘t want to hound him or have him develope unhealthy eating habits, but the bottom line is that he needs to eat. I know many of you face the same problems, perhaps for different reasons. I’m so tired of trying to explain to people how much sensory processing issues can complicate dietary things. I think it’s a difficult concept to grasp. Thankfully, most of our family is on board. I still get the odd, if he’s really hungry, he’ll eatfrom people. I was thinking it would be a good thing to talk about this and share our experience, tips and tricks. How have you coped with this type of dietary struggle? Please share your story in the comments below. :-)

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Aug 05 2012

I’m just to tired and overwhelmed


Typically I write with much for frequency and intent.  However,  lately I’ve been so tired that putting my thoughts in order is very difficult. 

I’m going to likely take the rest of today off and try to put things in order.

Lizze and I may have a chance to get out of the house,  without the boys.  She’s so overwhelmed that I want to give her as much of my attention as possible today.  She my best friend and I want to get her away for a few hours.

Thanks everyone for everything…

**Thanks for reading**

       -Lost and Tired

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This was posted via WordPress for Android, courtesy of Samsung’s Galaxy S III. Please forgive any typos. I do know how to spell but auto-correct is working against me.

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May 29 2012

10 Things You Don’t Know About Me


I thought it would be a growing experience for me to share with you 10 things about myself that I don’t share with many people. Some of these things are very personal  and I never talk about.  I’m trying to grow as a person and so I think that by sharing these things,  maybe I can do just that. This list is in no particular order of importance or significance to me.

10 Thing’s You Don’t Known About Me

1) I’m terrified of the dentist and haven’t seen one in over 10 years.  I take good care of my teeth but I get sick just thinking about going to the dentist.

2) I’m ashamed that when Gavin has behavioral issues,  I sometimes view him differently than I do my biological children. I perceive him as a threat and instinctively want to protect the boys from his behaviors.

3) I hate Gavin’s biological father and paternal grandmother for everything they did to Gavin and my family.  They abused Gavin and there was nothing we could do to stop it.  I will never forgive myself for what happened to my Gavin.

4) I sometimes miss my old life.  My life before I became a husband and a father.  Life is so stressful and I miss the simpler times. Having said that,  I would do this all over again if given the choice.

5) I haven’t been to see my Grandmother’s grave since the funeral,  many years ago.

6) I grew up with a neighbor that was a pedophile.  He did a lot of damage to me and many others. He was never prosecuted and I often think about confronting him. I think this is part of why I’m so sensitive to Gavin’s inappropriate touching.

7) I performed CPR on a 15 year old girl who was hit, literally run over and dragged by 2 cars, at high speed on the freeway.  You can’t even imagine what that was like. All of her clothes had been ground off of her and there wasn’t an unbroken bone in her entire body. I have never recovered from that experience and will never be able to remove those images from my head.

8 ) I lost a patient once,  that had been fighting with his wife prior to be taken to the hospital.  He went downhill so fast and we were so far away from the hospital.  The last thing he said was, “tell my wife I’m sorry and I love her”. I never did.  I had no idea how to say that and it’s haunted me ever since and affect my relationship with Lizze to this day.

9) I’m terrified that Gavin is slowly dying. So many bizarre and major things are going wrong with his health and no one can tell us how much worse this is going to get. They can’t even tell us what’s happening. I don’t know how much time we have left and I feel guilty correcting Gavin all the time because I don’t know what’s what with him. I know we have to do this but I’m afraid the last memories he will have of us or us of him, will be that of conflict.

10) I’m absolutely ashamed that I can’t do better or more for my family than I am.  A father is supposed to provide for his kids and give them a comfortable,  safe place to live and grow up.  A husband is supposed to that care of his wife and make sure she gets what she needs to improve her health. No matter what I do,  I can’t make anything better and whether or not it’s rational, it’s how I feel.

Posted from WordPress for Android so please forgive any typos as auto correct and I don’t get along very well sometimes.

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May 15 2012

Screw you Apple (UPDATED)


I’m so pissed off right now. I have dozens of reasons for disliking Apple and all they stand for but this latest issue has affected me directly. We switched back to Sprint in order to save money over Verizon. We were able to trade our phones in and get phones at Sprint for free. I am, or was, going to be trading mine in on Friday for the new HTC EVO 4G LTE. It’s the same price as my Galaxy Nexus and so it’s a straight up swap. However, the problem is that Friday is the very last day I can do that. Now it seems that the EVO will no longer be hitting the shelves this Friday, due to friggin Apple.

This was something I had really been looking forward to and now because of Apple, it likely will not happen. I’m hoping that this will get resolved and all will be fine for Friday but it’s not looking that way.

This is one of the many reasons why no one should be supporting Apple. Their business practices are disgusting and I would love to see a boycott. Apple’s method of competing in the market that is currently being dominated by Android devices, it to simply sue the manufactures for stupid and bizarre copyright infringements. While they don’t always win, they do succeed in getting devices banned or in this case delayed.

Now, the US launch of the HTC one X and the replacement phone I was supposed to get on Friday, the HTC Evo 4G LTE have been delayed at customs and this is a direct result of Apple previous lawsuit. The below post was from Engadet.

No one should stand for this. I’m a huge supporter of Android and companies like Samsung, HTC and Motorola. I would love to see Google finally step up to the plate and lay the smack down on Apple.

The original post can be found here.


We’ve just received a statement from HTC indicating that the One X for AT&T and the EVO 4G LTE for Sprint have been delayed at customs due to an ITC exclusion order that was handed down last December at Apple’s behest. That order was set to go into effect on April 19th, and it looks like HTC’s two new stateside superphones are the first to feel Apple’s the government’s wrath.

Here’s HTC’s take on the matter:

The US availability of the HTC One X and HTC EVO 4G LTE has been delayed due to a standard U.S. Customs review of shipments that is required after an ITC exclusion order. We believe we are in compliance with the ruling and HTC is working closely with Customs to secure approval.

The HTC One X and HTC EVO 4G LTE have been received enthusiastically by customers and we appreciate their patience as we work to get these products into their hands as soon as possible.

We’ve reached out to HTC for clarification on the delay and to find out if this will affect the launch of the EVO 4G LTE, which is expected to hit the shelves this Friday, May 18th. Stay tuned for updates.

This following information is from the Verge.


The HTC One X and Evo 4G LTE are notable devices for many reasons, but today they become notorious: they’re the first devices to face an import delay at US Customs for potentially infringing an Apple patent. We’ve learned today that the One X and Evo 4G LTE are indefinitely delayed at Customs as the agency investigates patent issues with Apple, and sources have further confirmed that some shipments are indeed being held back.

The One X is also currently out of stock at AT&T’s online store and at most AT&T retail stores we’ve called — and few had any information on when more units would arrive.

Apple won a wide-ranging exclusion order banning the importation of HTC Android devices at the International Trade Commission last December — the ITC found that Android’s messaging app and browser infringed upon Apple patent #5,946,647, which covers automatically converting things like phone numbers and email addresses into actionable links that open a menu of options.

The ban was delayed so HTC could engineer around Apple’s patent claims, but it went into effect on April 19th — and although HTC claimed so-called “data tapping” was a “small UI experience” that would be completely removed from its US Android devices, Customs is now reviewing the One X and Evo 4G LTE.


Although the ITC order was handed down before the One X was even announced at Mobile World Congress, it’s open-ended enough to block importation of any HTC Android device — the ITC broadly prohibited the importation of HTC “personal data and mobile communications devices” running Android that infringe the ’647 patent. Customs and Border Protection is in charge of executing the order, and it’s allowed to handle things pretty much any way it wants; there are really no formal rules governing how exclusion orders are interpreted or enforced. What’s more, the final enforcement instructions delivered by Customs to its officers are totally classified — they’re even excluded from Freedom of Information Act requests.

At this point HTC is basically in limbo while it waits for Customs to issue a decision.

HTC can certainly try to stay the ban while it further appeals the case; the company’s official statement is below. We’ve also reached out to Apple, AT&T, and Sprint, we’ll update you as we learn more.

The US availability of the HTC One X and HTC EVO 4G LTE has been delayed due to a standard U.S. Customs review of shipments that is required after an ITC exclusion order. We believe we are in compliance with the ruling and HTC is working closely with Customs to secure approval. The HTC One X and HTC Evo 4G LTE have been received enthusiastically by customers and we appreciate their patience as we work to get these products into their hands as soon as possible.


Apple, your practices are deplorable. Perhaps you could invest your wealth into creating new and unique products, instead of wiping out the competition with lawsuit’s.

Fuck You Apple…….




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Apr 13 2012

#Autism: Through the eyes of Denise


This is a guest post by Denise. She responded to my request for people to come forward and let me help them share their story. My goal with this little project is to help everyone have a voice and to show the world how different #Autism is for everyone. I’ll be cleaning up the format in short order and make a few tweaks to the process. I have already received a huge response to this and I’m so excited to be able to be a part of this. 

Thank you Denise, for opening up your lives for all of us to see. :-)  

Please note that I have not edited or censored this story in any way whatsoever. These are Denise’s words…


Meeting Autism: A Work in Progress


Our youngest son Mark was born in 2003, the fourth of our children.  He was the most quiet, pleasant and easiest of the children as a baby.  His development seemed normal and timely, walking around 11 months, interacting with toys and siblings, seeming curious about his surroundings.  It was around the age of three we started to realize he might be delayed in speech, but by age four, Mark’s speech delay seemed to be resolving.  He was talking but it was scripted, like phrases borrowed and repeated from TV programs or, as we soon came to realize, the written word. He had somehow taught himself to read much to our amazement.  He had decoded written language and was reading everything from traffic signs, store signs, billboards and worse…tabloid headlines in the supermarket check-out, out loud!  His favorite things on TV were the “credits” running at the end of a show, he would get up really close to  and nearly stick his nose on the screen to see them while rising up on his tiptoes and flapping his hands. He also had a strong fascination for a magic erase board, Magna-Doodle, that he began to play with constantly; in fact, he wore his first one out and we later replaced it, (he has since graduated to a DSi “Flipnotes” drawing program).   Also at this time he was beginning to line up toys and stack things into tall towers.  He would remove all the cereal boxes and sort them in rows and all the canned goods lining them up across the kitchen floor like a long train. This included VHS tapes, DVDs, books, condiments and other refrigerator items; I was growing exhausted just keeping up with the clean-up.  He also began the habit of running away, down the street and around the corner and would simply not listen to STOP, or COME BACK, and was beginning to frighten us terribly that something serious could happen.  We had to be sure things were locked down, and even cupboards were secured. 

Around the time that Mark’s speech emerged with all its glitches, the more anxious we were to have him evaluated, but as fate would have it, another of our sons was growing extremely ill physically and mentally.  It was consuming much of my time as a mother of four and a home school teacher which at the time was preparing our oldest son for graduation and college.  Mark was temporarily put on the “do later” list while his brother, four years older than him needed immediate attention.  This meant many trips to the local doctor, and the nearest children’s hospital, more than an hour away as we are located in a rural northeastern Ohio area.  This son was later diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), accompanied by generalized anxiety and sensory sensitivity.  Once we had this son more stabilized, which took a good year and several months, we began to turn our focus back to Mark.  During the waiting period I had continued to school Mark, kept him involved with engaging activities, implementing in-home therapies I had read about in books like “The Out-of-Sync Child has Fun”, (Carol Stock Kranowitz) such as rolling and bouncing on a large nubby sensory ball.  I had to assign a watch-person, usually another sibling to him at all times,  and took inventory of his deficits as well as noted his areas of improvement, while all the while, educating myself with books, articles and DVDs on Autism spectrum disorders, suspecting Autism was what we were facing.

The waiting list for evaluation in pediatric neurology was a 4 month wait.  Finally, in the fall of 2010we made the long drive to the Neuro Development department of our children’s hospital at the referral of our family doctor to begin the evaluation process for Autism; Mark was turning 7 years old at the time.   He was scheduled for a full screening, several hours long, including ADOS testing (Autism Diagnostic Observation Schedule), speech-language, hearing, vision, I.Q testing and physical exam.  Behaviors we’d been seeing would be evaluated such as those glitches in communication, bodily actions such as  hand-flapping, and  large motor movements like suddenly breaking out in skipping across the room back and forth – back and forth, repetitively so,  (“stimming” as we later learned); not making much eye contact, as well as being absorbed in play unto himself, not seeming to notice anyone coming in or out of the room;  playing among the children in gym co-op but not necessarily with them.

After three visits to neurology, Mark was diagnosed with Autism, high functioning with Hyperlexia and above average I.Q.   As is the case, many autistic children are intelligent but their impairments make them unable to communicate this fact.  My son needed language therapy, occupational therapy, and we were given a written order to pursue genetic testing when able. The speech pathologist as well as the neurologist gave a thorough report with many suggestions and recommendations. Because we home school, we are able to focus very directly on Mark’s deficits and work into our curriculum and daily routine, methods and practices that help him in several areas of processing such as reading comprehension. We had to wait to get into therapies as you might guess the waiting lists at many facilities are very long.  It took 3 months to finally be accepted into a schedule of language therapy, and more recently occupational therapy.  While we waited we employed some further resource recommendations from the neurologist such as “Social Stories” by Dr. Carol Gray, ( and Model-Me-Kids DVDs (

Mark has done very well in his therapies for many months now and has made progress. The speech therapist works on his functional/conversational language through a lot of board game playing; she interweaves the “job” that needs to be done through the game playing, and gets results.  This was how she was able to get Mark to make eye contact during conversing by making it part of the game. It took about 4 months to see a natural use of eye contact come about.  My husband was thrilled the first time Mark just naturally looked at him making eye contact while “initiating” a conversation, another thing he simply just never did before therapy.  We were glad to find a location that is about a half-hour from us that insurance would cover, as I juggle therapy/doctor visits for both Mark and his brother with OCD weekly.

To say the least, while it is rewarding to manage two special needs children 24/7 it is also the hardest job I have ever done. It is demanding to the point of exhaustion and the worry about their futures weighs ever heavy in my heart and mind. My husband works a full time and a part time job to help provide further finances and allow us the insurance coverage we need.  Along with my husband, my friends closest to me hear the frustrations and stress whether in person, by phone or social media.  I am grateful to have those I vent to who understand and have held me up on many an occasion.

While Autism itself wasn’t new to us, (I have a first cousin with Autism), having a child of our own with the disorder is.  Our journey has just begun with Mark and it is definitely a work in progress. In taking inventory, we are pleased with Mark’s improvements but ever so aware of how we must advocate constantly for his betterment and for better and affordable services available to all those with autism across the board.  We are grateful to have such good professionals, including therapists helping us. We are also glad that so much is being written and shown to the public now, raising Autism awareness and helping to fund further research.

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Mar 15 2012

Off to a good start


Lizze’s headache infusion is underway.  The boys are off to school and Emmett is eating breakfast. Everything went rather smooth and we only had a few hiccups along the way. 

Emmett decided that he didn’t want to go with me to take his brothers to school.  He always wants to go.  It figures that the one day he can’t stay home is the day he decides to protest having to go. 

I had to bribe him with 2 sausage patties from McDonalds.  I’m not a fan of bribing my kids but sometimes it’s a necessary evil.

His very simple order was screwed up and we didn’t realize it till we got home.  They have him apple slices instead of apple juice. He’s pretty upset about that but seems to be coping pretty well.

I’m completely exhausted because at some point,  Emmett climbed into our bed and forced me into a very uncomfortable position and I didn’t sleep well. However,  Lizze slept like the dead,  so that’s a good thing as she’s been battling insomnia lately.

Hopefully,  the day will go smoothly….  :-)

**Thanks for reading**

       -Lost and Tired

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