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I’m writing this post and feeling quite overwhelmed and frustrated.  Gavin is back to having meltdowns each day again.

We had experienced a lull in number of meltdowns he has had in recent months. 

However,  that period of peace and relative tranquility has come to an end.  Gavin is back to having meltdowns over anything that doesn’t go his way and I’ll be real honest with you here,  it’s driving me crazy.

We had at least two meltdowns today alone.  I don’t remember what the first one was about,  but the second one involved a decision he made causing Emmett to get hurt. 

He starts out by bending his fingers back to the point of almost breaking them.  Then he slams his foot to the side so he’s standing on his ankles,  if that makes sense.  This is followed by him teasing up the rest of his body and then comes the screaming.

This afternoons meltdown sent Elliott into a panic and flying down the stairs.

I’ve come to the point that I accept the fact that Gavin is going to have these meltdowns and very likely self-injure. Sadly,  I have grown callous to that as it has happened way to many times and he tries to use the self-injury as a means of manipulation.

What I do have an issue with and this is what frustrates…no possess me off.  Gavin doesn’t seem to recognize,  let alone care about the impact his actions have on the rest of the family. 

When he melts down and causes one of the other boys to either get hurt or become terrified by his actions,  it gets under my skin.

I have become a bit complacent in recent months because we haven’t had these issues.  As a result,  I have let things go for fear of the meltdown that may ensue if I address the problem in that manner in which it warrants.

Does that make sense?  Do you ever base a disciplinary decision on whether or not you can deal with the fallout that will undoubtedly happen after a consequence has been dealt?

I have and I can admit that. 

Sometimes it simply comes down to survival. Sometimes the right thing and the wrong thing seem to pale in comparison to literally surviving the moment. 

It’s not always the best thing to base a decision on but the already fine line between good and less than good decision making in special needs parenting can sometimes become less important than physically living to fight another day.

We typically call it,  picking our battles.

As far as Gavin’s meltdowns are concerned,  we have to decide of correcting a negative behavior is worth the 45 minutes we will have to endure that meltdown that will more likely than not follow.

This isn’t an easy decision because there are both long term and short term things to consider,  as well as the affects those decisions will have in the rest of the family.

Nothing about this is easy,  but than again,  if it were easy,  anyone could do this job…right?

This has been posted to WordPress via Galaxy S2 Epic Touch 4G by Samsung, without the use of proper editing tools.