Autism, Aspergers, Rob Gorski,Special Needs Parenting, Reactive Attachment Disorder, Fibromyalgia,

Tag Archive: deal

Dec 19 2012

Nothing makes me feel safer than a drug dealer in my front yard


I just want to go on the record as saying that I’m being completely sarcastic in this post. 

Nothing makes me feel safer than stepping outside to let the dogs out and interrupting a drug deal. That’s what happened to me tonight. 

I was letting the dogs out and stumbled onto a drug deal going down.


Thankfully, they took off down the street but went into my neighbors property.  I called them to let them know people were snooping around. Again, they took off running.

However, while I standing outside with my neighbors, another drug deal went down not 20 yards away.  While I was out there, they told me that they called the police because someone was snooping around our house and peaking in windows. .

I really hesitated telling Lizze but she needs to be aware so she can be a bit more vigilant, as will I. 

It’s really getting scary over here anymore.  A little over a year ago we were involved in a drive by shooting and shortly before that, I provided first aid to someone that was stabbed and literally gutted in front of our house. Of course, right after that, our van was stolen. 

While I’m grateful to have a roof over our heads, I’m scared to live here and as you know front my confession post the other day, I’m a pretty big guy. 

One of my goals for this coming year is to get my family into a safer neighborhood.

We were supposed to move this year but the whole van thing killed that option.

Canton Ohio is not among the safest places to live and as soon as I can, I be putting it in rear view mirror of our new van.

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Dec 18 2012

Wanted: Parenting Advice


Lizze and I have found ourselves in a position where we aren’t sure what the right thing to do is. Normally these positions revolve around Gavin but this time it’s Elliott.

As many of you know, Elliott has aspergers and severe anxiety.  He’s been through a great deal in his life, especially in the last month or so.

This week at school is martial arts promotion and the schools annual Christmas program. Elliott wants nothing to do both either.  Promotion is actually this afternoon around 2pm. However, that conflicts with Elliott‘s weekly OT appointment.

At this point, Elliott is doesn‘t want to miss OT. He’s also dead set on not participating in the Christmas show his classroom is putting on this Thursday.

As his parent, I’m at a loss as to what we should do.

I understand what’s behind this.  He really needs OT and knows that it will help him to feel better. He’s been through a lot this past weekend and is grappling for some control and stability in his life.  Personally, I’m of the mindset to let him have it.  Lizze however, thinks he should at least go to promotion.

Part of me knows that she’s right. Promotion is a pretty big deal and it’s all about building him up. She’s absolutely right

However, we both don‘t want to make his anxiety any worse.


He’s already struggling with the fact that we had to put my old dog Rogue down over the weekend.  She has been there all his life and now she’s not. 

This is really his first run in with loss.  Do we really want to push him?

It’s not like he’s asking to just stay home.  He wants to go to OT and that’s productive and a physical outlet. I want to give him control over his life, as does Lizze.  The question is, how much control?

As far as the Christmas show on Thursday, I honestly couldn’t care less what he does. This is something put on for the parents and he’s really freaked out by this.  Lizze and I don‘t want to force him to do something that really isn’t important in the grand scheme of things, especially if it will upset him this much. 

He told me today that he’s having a hard time remembering the words to the songs and he gets confused and embarrassed.

I’ve offered to help him learn the words as well as encouraged him to go through with it. 

However, I think that all he really wants is to be rescued from this and told that he doesn‘t have to do it.  Again, I’m of the mindset to let him make the choice.

Having said that, I don‘t know if that’s the right thing to do. 

I mean, Elliott‘s only 6 years old and lost a great deal in a short amount of time.  If he needs to make some decisions in his life, shouldn’t we let him? We’re not talking life or death decisions here. We’re talking attending events at school that have him extremely anxious. 

Of course, he’s going to have to learn to do things, even though he doesn‘t want to.  However, he has the rest of his life to do that.  We have a chance to provide him with some relief and I don‘t see a compelling reason not to give it to him.

What would you do? Have any of your kids been in a similar situation? How have you handled it? How much control do you give a 6 year old little boy?

I would really appreciate your thoughts on this. 

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Dec 16 2012

#Autism, #Anxiety and Medication: Update 12/16/2012


I wanted to update you on how Elliott‘s doing now that he’s off the anti-anxiety medications.

It’s been about a week since Elliott had his last dose of Tenex. He had not been on it for too long, but long enough to know that it wasn’t the right medication for him. It’s really hard to tell if he’s doing better or not but stopping was the right thing to do.

Currently, Elliott is very moody and still anxious but he’s got a great deal on his plate. I don’t know how well any 6 year old would deal with it all. I will say that he does seem to be a bit less stressed at times.

For right now, Elliott‘s life is medication free and we are working on other ways to help him manage everything. We’re doing a lot of art type things like drawing and crafts. He really seems to respond to that.

Right now, that’s where we stand. We’re taking it one day at a time……….

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Jun 30 2012

This doesn’t seem like good deal


I grabbed this picture of the Burger King sign on my way to the farmers market.  I love signs that a flawed and thought this one was pretty funny.

The sign reads: Original Chicken $104 Fri Sat Sun.


Punctuation is very important when writing and even more so to the person reading.

**Thanks for reading**

       -Lost and Tired

Please join our Autism Help Forum

Look for “Autism Help” app at the Google Play Store Registered & Protected

This was posted via WordPress for Android, courtesy of Samsung’s Galaxy S III. Please forgive any typos. I do know how to spell but auto-correct is working against me.

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May 28 2012

When your little one can’t sleep


I have honestly lost track of the time.  It’s either really late or really early.  :-)
Emmett,  my littlest minion,  is not feeling well and has a runny nose. I know it may not seem like a big deal but for a child with #Autism and various sensory issues,  it really is a big deal.

Emmett struggles with the sensation for his nose running.  He basically panics and doesn’t know what to do.

It’s heartbreaking really.  We are out of benedryl,  so it’s going to be a long night. I sent Lizze to bed awhile ago because she hasn’t been sleeping much lately,  which is ironic for someone with hypersomnia and chronic fatigue.

Emmett and I have decided to squishy couch.  Basically,  we push the two couches together and make one giant bed.

Anyway, Emmett is under his weighted blanket and chillin with his tablet.  We have Color Crew on NetFlix in the background and he’s getting tired and will hopefully fall asleep soon. Daddy’s very tired and needs his beauty sleep.

The truth of the matter is, that as a parent,  we endure many uncomfortable or unpleasant things for the betterment of our little ones. When our little ones have special needs,  it’s that much more important to provide whatever comfort we can,  when we can.  If that means a sleepless night on a giant uncomfortable bed, made from two crappy couches,  than so be it.  :-)


**Thanks for reading**

       -Lost and Tired

Please join our Autism Help Forum

Look for “Autism Help” app at the Google Play Store Registered & Protected

Posted from WordPress for Android so please forgive any typos as auto correct and I don’t get along very well sometimes.

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Apr 25 2012

#Autism: What I’ve learned


I’ve been a special needs parent for almost a decade now. The one thing that has become very apparently to me is the following.  #Autism has a great deal to teach me and I have a great deal left to learn.

**Thanks for reading**

       -Lost and Tired

Please join our Autism Help Forum

Look for “Autism Help” app at the Google Play Store Registered & Protected

Posted from WordPress for Android so please forgive any typos as auto-correct and I don‘t see eye to eye. :-)

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Mar 24 2012

#Autism: How I manage a meltdown


For many years we dealt with meltdowns in solitude. We didn’t ever let anyone see these because we didn’t think they would understand.  It seemed like something we should keep private. However, all that did was further isolate us from the rest of the world. We would explain to our friends and family about the meltdowns but never allowed them to witness one. Anytime Gavin would get all worked up we would leave and deal with that at home, away from everyone else.

That was one of the biggest mistakes we could have made. I say that because, there is no way I could expect anyone to understand the gravity and impact of one of these meltdowns. I mean, how could they. It’s difficult to put into words what not only Gavin experiences but we experience as well. When we would tell someone, that we couldn’t come over because it would inevitably lead to overstimulation and then a huge meltdown, they didn’t understand. The problem that their definition of meltdown and what we were experiencing with Gavin were completely different. We were told we were overreacting or making a bigger deal out of it than we should. After all, Gavin was so cute and small, how could he possibly do the things we were saying he does?

At some point and I don’t remember when, it hit me that the only way they would ever understand is if they experience it first hand. This meant that when we were at someone’s house and Gavin was winding up, we would deal with it onsite, meltdown and all.

Needless to say, it only took once before most people finally got it. They could not believe what they were seeing. Maybe this is wrong of me but there was something liberating about someone else witnessing what we went through every single day. I was such an awesome moment to know that people were finally starting to understand.

I can’t tell you how many of our family members, teachers, therapist and doctors have told us that if they hadn’t seen it with their own eyes, they would never have believed what he was capable of.

Having said everything above, I want you to understand why I share these videos.

I truly think that people won’t understand until they experience it themselves or at least witness it first hand. I’m not ashamed that Gavin has these meltdowns and neither should he. In Gavin’s case, he is emotionally about 3 or 4 years of age, when his body is a 12 year old boy. Gavin reacts like this at times it affects the entire Lost and Tired family. We do our best to help him work through them in the only way that works for him. To someone without first hand knowledge of Gavin and what works and what doesn’t, might think this approach is cruel or without compassion. All I can say is that we have tried everything over the years that we could think of and this approach is the only one we have ever had success with.

Plus, we have other children to worry about as well. If it were just my wife and I, perhaps we could afford to handle things a bit differently. However, our two other boys are terrified during these meltdowns and so I have to try and defuse them as rapidly as possible.

Gavin doesn’t have these as often as he used to but they are still very intense and disruptive. Lately, he has begun the whole self-injury thing again. In this video you even hear me remind him what happens if that starts up again.

My hope is that these videos will help others to better understand what we mean when we use the word meltdown. Every child is different, but I think this will help get the point across.


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